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Positive thinking means having the courage of your own convictions

It’s one of those sad but true facts - most people live their lives based on the expectations and opinions of others. Instead of allowing themselves to be individuals with their own ideas and aspirations they let their fears take over, concerned that they will not receive approval from their peers or anyone else that might have a different mind-set.

time for change

If everyone felt that way it would be almost impossible for an original idea or project to ever get off the ground so let’s be thankful for those individuals prepared to stand by their thoughts and put them into action.

But what about you - are you prepared to let your thoughts and ideas withstand scrutiny from the court of public opinion? If that is the case you have in effect decided that pleasing others is more important and without realising it, you are living their reality and not your own.

Positive thinking means having the courage of your own convictions without letting others dictate the agenda – easier said than done for most – as we all want to be liked and have the knowledge that our friends and colleagues approve of what we do.

Business leaders, entrepreneurs and the world’s most successful people make their own decisions without fear or favour and while they understand that in an ideal world it’s much better to take others with you – they are honest enough to understand that it is not always possible.

Making decisions that work for you, but might not be approved by others, is made even worse by social media. People are quick to criticise without understanding the full picture and this can quickly turn into mob mentality and rob you of any confidence.

It is easy of course to glibly tell you that you should disregard what others think. Most of us are not strong enough to take that route, but sometimes you have to be your own person regardless of what anyone else might do or say and that means letting go of your fears.

We have spoken about fears in other blogs on this website, but making decisions and keeping to them is something entirely different and if you can master this then everything else to do with positive thinking is relatively easy.

If you are to live within your own reality you must learn how to make decisions that suit you and your lifestyle and now is a good time to start. Think about the things you want to accomplish and imagine for the moment that there is nothing to hold you back.

Ok! Let’s take a look at some of these decisions – it helps by the way if you can write them down – and then we can work out how we are going to deliver them. This is the basis of powerful positive thinking.

The decisions you have made will almost certainly be based on something that really improves your life or it will be about something you desire or need to happen. Now let’s take a look at the negatives – the things, for want of a better expression that others might not want to approve.

Best to write these down again if you can, because when you do you will see these negatives for what they really are – you worrying unnecessarily about what others might think. They could of course involve you in a major change of lifestyle and your decision to take a different path may affect others – but this is your life we are talking about and only you can make the changes needed.

It’s important that you rationalise these negatives and understand that you are trying to do your best to improve your life. Others may be hurt by your decisions but ask yourself what benefit is there to you, your children and others involved if you are living in a loveless marriage, or trapped looking after others, or in a job you hate – how long does this list have to be.

Ask yourself what you could lose if you don’t take this next big step into the unknown. Will you forever be living a life of regret – a useless emotion – because your fear of what others might think or say has held you back?

This is your life, your reality and you deserve the best and as the world’s most successful people will tell you – you cannot please all of the people all of the time – but you can please yourself. Isn’t it about time you got started?

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