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The positive thinking way to overcome jealousy

Have you ever thought what jealousy can do to a person? It is one of the most negative of all emotions. It has the ability to destroy relationships, it creates incredible amounts of unnecessary pain and its corrosive influence can damage lives forever, but positive thinking does offer a solution and more about that later.

We are all subject to a little bit of green from time to time to time, that moment when we really wish that it was us receiving the praise or that special prize, but most of us grit our teeth, wish the recipient well and do our best to make sure that we are on the winning team next time.

Positive thinking people recognise that jealousy under these circumstances is perfectly natural and are able to feel pleased and enjoy someone else’s success, but for a few others, their emotions take over and they become totally irrational.

In extreme cases jealous reactions border on serious mental health issues and if you know someone like this then I urge you to encourage them to seek professional help, if they will listen. We know of people who constantly believe their partner is being unfaithful or cannot believe they have come second or have been turned down for that top job

No one with such a serious jealous nature can ever benefit from positive thinking. They are so focused on others that they lose sight of the bigger picture and invent reasons why rivals have benefited and they have not.

When this happens, jealousy can swiftly turn into irrational hatred and so begins the descent into negativity. If you recognise yourself here then you already know that your jealousy can only end in tears and will eventually alienate you from everyone you love and hold dear. You also know that you are the only person who can do something about it – so if you want to change and you are ready, then let’s begin.

Most people are jealous because they are unsure of themselves, they believe they are unworthy in some way and this is turn causes anxiety and fears. This applies in relationships, job situations and other areas that involve some kind of interaction or competition.

When you are so focussed on the successes or perceived failures of others then it is impossible to look at your own shortcomings and make all the necessary repairs to your own life, but this is what you must do, however difficult it might seem in the beginning.

First you have to accept and rationalise why you are jealous about something or someone. Give yourself a good talking to, it really does help. Decide that you are jealous and ask the question why and just so you don’t miss anything, write a list – and do not leave out the detail.

When you start to write down why you are jealous it really does focus your attention and when you read it back, it almost seem ridiculous why you feel the way you do. He or she gets all the breaks - well so what. He or she is better looking than me – really. They are more talented than me – and your point is. My partner is being unfaithful – so where is the evidence.

Sooner or later you will realise that you are focussing on all the good things that others have and you are comparing yourself in a negative way and the result is jealousy.

When the penny drop you then need to start looking at all the good things about you.

So start that second list and write down as many positive points that make you the unique and special person you are – and do not be modest. This is where your focus should really be because you cannot alter what happens in other people’s lives and if you are going to be a positive thinking person then you first need to like yourself and your abilities.

Decide to do this and you begin to concentrate on the good things that make you special. You start to look at your strengths instead of focussing on your perceived weaknesses. You begin to understand why others act in the way they do and it’s not about any perceived sleight against you.

Once you have started this process you can then begin to use positive thinking to turn your life around, by attracting all the things that before you were missing out on. Your relationships begins to improve and suddenly opportunities start coming your way – and do you know what – you might even find that others are jealous of you – now that would really be something.

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