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There are real life benefits when you stop complaining

Are you one of life’s complainers? Do you see fault in almost everything and everyone? If the answer is yes to both those questions then you are not alone. Most of us like to have a good moan with some researchers suggesting that people complain up to 50 or more times every day.

This is really bad news – and something else to complain about if you like – because all that moaning is really affecting your health. It creates stress, negativity and worst case scenario; it is preventing you from reaching your goals.

When you really warm up to complain, your blood pressure starts to rise, you are pumping adrenaline into your system as you create stress and discomfort, your heart starts to beat a little faster – and without realising it you are doing this dozens of times a day

You might now be thinking that 50 seems to be a very high figure and that cannot possibly apply to you until you start doing the maths. When I ask people to write down how many times they complain in an average day – they are usually shocked. More often than not most exceed 50 and it is not unusual to see 200 incidences of complaining within a 24 hour period.

It is probably best to define what I mean about complaining. There is nothing wrong with making your feelings known if you have received bad service or a shoddy product or alternatively if someone is letting you down in some way. This is legitimate complaining and needs to be sorted – and in a peculiar kind of way this can be very therapeutic – good complaining, for want of a better phrase, to get all those feelings out of your system.

I’m really talking about the stuff you probably fail to notice. You complain you’re too tired, too cold, too hot. You say it’s too noisy, too quiet, too crowded, too fast, too slow – you get the idea. You complain about your children, other people’s children, how long has this list got to be.

By now you are so used to moaning that it has become part of your life, a pattern of negativity that impacts on to everything you do. Good friends hate that part of your character – just ask yourself – how many times have people told you to stop complaining.

Now, here comes the big question – if you accept that you are a serial complainer – what are you going to do about it? Complaining is a habit that is hard to break, but if you realise there is a problem, then you can confront your brain as the words come out and change your life forever.

First recognise that you are complaining and ask yourself why. If it’s legitimate then that’s OK, but if it is no more than a passing grumble then it has no room in your life and you must set about changing that thought.

There are a couple of ways of doing this which you might like to try. It takes a little practice and you may feel a little foolish to begin with but the objective is start changing the habit. As you complain turn the thought or expression into gratitude. Be thankful that you have noisy kids, be grateful that the sun is shining and it’s hot outside.

If things are tough or uncomfortable tell yourself it will pass, the rain doesn’t last forever, you are unlikely to see that obnoxious person ever again. It is your life and your thoughts and you have the power to change negative grumbles into positive affirmations with whatever challenges you face.

And here’s the good news, when you do you will be amazed at how much better you feel.  Stopping complaining will make you feel happier, you energy levels will rise, your shoulders will no longer sag and people will notice.

Those that did not want to be part of your life will welcome your company, better job opportunities will come your way and perhaps you will find a new love – because you have now stopped being a complainer and the universe likes what it sees.

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