If You Can’t Explain It

We often assume that understanding something means knowing the words, remembering the facts or being able to repeat what someone else has told us. But there is a much better test: Can you explain it in your own words? The same question can be applied to the way we think about ourselves.

We all carry beliefs that influence our choices. You might believe you are not confident, that you are bad with money, that you always make the wrong decisions or that you could never succeed at something. But can you explain why you believe those things? Where did they come from?

A belief can feel like a fact when you have carried it for long enough. Yet familiarity does not make something true. Some of our strongest beliefs were formed from childhood experiences, criticism, disappointment or a single failure that we allowed to become part of our identity.

Positive thinking is not about replacing every negative thought with a positive one. It is about becoming curious about the thoughts already occupying your mind.

When you catch yourself thinking, I can't do this, ask what you actually mean. Is it impossible, or is it unfamiliar? When you think, I'm not good enough, ask who decided what “good enough” means.

The more clearly you can explain your thinking, the easier it becomes to challenge it.

You are not broken because you have beliefs that hold you back. You may be carrying ideas that were never yours to begin with. If you can't explain why you believe something, it may be time to question it.